Monday, November 30, 2009


Well, just an update on me/ I am home, was in the hospital for 5 days w/pneumonia---had it bad, never had it before. Don't want to get it again. I appreciate all the prayers, comments, cards, & flowers. I guess at times like this you find out who your friends are, how much you are loved, & how tough you are. I recently read a friends' blog about TOUGH (KP) & he couldn't have been more right. It got me thinking. Let me explain the three I listed.

1. Friends--- we all have friends, we have so many but we all want or need just that one friend we can talk to & tell anything to but I guess sometimes we want that one friend to be someone we choose. Okay your thinking ok, it is the one you choose but hear me out. I find myself 9 out of 10 times not telling that "one" friend, Best Friend, or whomever. I normally don't tell anyone at all. Why? The trust factor kicks in. I ask myself, If I tell this to this person, what will they say? or who will they tell? do they care? I'm pretty good judge of character and yes past incidents w/a friend determines if I can ever tell them something again in the future. I guess it just sucks when you expect a "friend" during tough times that "friend" doesn't come through. Which here recently while my stay in the hospital I found my True Friend(s). My family!!! (Home & Work)

2. How much you are loved --- By Friday, I was getting better & emotions FLEW!!! I could cry on the drop of dime, still can. The first time my kids came to visit me, I was still out of it. But to see their eyes looking at me, surveying the room and that I wasn't in good shape scared them. They did not like seeing me like this. I could hear them coming down the hall, looking into each room wondering which one I am in. Then when they saw me, holding their homemade 'get well' cards, it was the sweetest sights. They both hugged me, kissed me, and starting explaining their cards. Then they started asking tons of questions. Of course, they didn't like the fact I wasn't coming home and it hit. Cora came over to get my hand and help me get out to go home; sadly I had to say I can't baby. I just looked at her & her face; her hazel eyes began to water up... a tear fell, her lips sealed & a frown on her face. She looked at me, looked at her daddy then she walked over to her daddy, put her head in her hands and fell into Botos' chest and started crying!!! OMG... I lost it, still do. Bout that time Botos decided it was time to go; so they made a quick get-away but it was a silent one; Cora started crying even harder, knowing I wasn't coming w/her. Needless to say I cried myself to sleep. Now Jantz, he knew we were sad but he was more focused on eating everything on my tray, which got me thinking if Botos' was feeding them at home! lol Sweet kids, sweet kids. Pure innocence ya know. The next evening, Cora stayed w/me, by herself, which she & I both needed. We took a shower, she washed my hair, put lotion on me, combed my hair.... perfect evening. Cora & I needed that. BB then came & got her.

3. Toughness--- After a few days, I told myself that I had to be tough. So I got to come home on Sunday. But the Dr's orders were to REST, REST, REST! Which I am doing but its tough. You don't want to over do it to soon and have a set back. So I can't work this week, miss my kids at P.E. & my Lady Cats. Which I know will be there when I get back. Its tough. Just to sit and rest. Even though a lot of the times that is all we want to do. Life is to precious to sit back and rest. You get one LIFE! Live it to the Fullest. My husband is TOUGH! Why... he had to sit and watch his wife, lay up in the hospital, ache & cry, being miserable. He showed me Tough Love, by that he was there. He was there for the kids, feed them, bathe them, take them here & there, answer questions, plus work. I missed him so much, just his hand in mine or a sweet kiss on the forehead. Botos is simply the best.

Just a few more things. I need to become a better friend myself. I need to become a better Christian. I need to become a better wife & mom. I need to take better care of my body. I need to take better care of my home. All these things are like a two way street, it takes both sides. I have got to step up to the batter's box and perform. While my stay in the hospital as been an eye opener. I'm not changing who I am, I am simply polishing up on a few things about me.

Until next time... Mamabotos

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